It's good manners to be in a relationship. And if not, that you haven't been single for too long. Whatever "too long" means.
Everyone wants to hook up
When I tell my friends that I've been single for more than two years, the reaction is usually the same. It starts with the question of whether something is already "on the cards". If I say no, the suggestions follow. "Why don't you go out again", or "I'll sign you up for Swissdate", or "Lots of people find each other on the internet these days, have you tried that?". Or really bad: "Do you know Maria (name made up), she would be something for you!"
Fewer problems
People are incredulous or even shocked when I admit to being very happy with this status. This irritates me all the more because I've had various partnerships and have gained my own experiences.
I always add the somewhat cynical sentence that I don't have any additional problems at the moment. I'm alluding to the saying I heard at a wedding (!): "Now you can solve problems together that you didn't even know you had before."
Alone
Admittedly, there are those moments when you would like to share your joys or sorrows with that one person, your partner. Sometimes you step into your home and would have appreciated it if you were expected. Instead, the apartment is exactly as you left it last time.
As a single person, you quickly convince yourself in such a situation that things are better overall. The friends are still there to celebrate or mourn, and nobody is angry with me for leaving the washing up.
The right one
Finally, as a single person, I have to admit that life as a couple has many advantages. But the longer you are your own boss, the more difficult it seems to be to come to terms with the idiosyncrasies of another person.
Nevertheless, I always imagine that I would recognize it when I meet "the right" person - so far this hasn't happened.
Single for too long? What do you think?
What experiences have you had as a single person and in a relationship? What do you think about the topic?
Discuss with other members in the forum.
Neues Buch: Single-Frauen: Ledig – frei und unbeschwert?
Single-Frauen haben es schwer: Sie werden oft als «unvollständig» und von oben herab betrachtet und mit «guten» Ratschlägen eingedeckt, wie sie wohl endlich den Richtigen finden könnten. In den Hinterköpfen versteckt sich immer noch der Begriff der «alten Jungfer» und an den Stammtischen hört man den Spruch «die hat keinen abgekriegt».
Dass man auch als Single-Frau glücklich sein kann, zeigt das neue Buch «Single-Frauen: Ledig – frei und unbeschwert?». Es enthält 14 Portraits von Frauen, die – freiwillig oder schicksalsbedingt – ein Leben ohne «starken Mann» verbringen und dabei selber stark werden. Die Singles gehen ganz unterschiedlich mit ihrem Status um. Während die eine verunsichert und einsam ist, geniesst die andere ihre Eigenständigkeit.
Genauso unterschiedlich wie ihre Einstellung zum Single-Dasein sind die Lebensentwürfe der portraitierten Ledigen: von der eigenwilligen Poetin Dora Koster über die Journalistin Ruth Gassmann bis zur 93-jährigen Kämpferin für Gleichstellung. Lesenswert!